Stutz is a documentary that is ostensibly about therapy, but is really about the endearing relationship between Jonah Hill and his therapist.
Notes
- Life force pyramid
- Body
- People
- Yourself
- If you’re lost don’t try and figure it out, work on those three things: work out, initiate relationships with people, write (journal)
- Part X
- Antisocial part of you, wants to keep you from changing and growing
- Voice of impossibility
- Tells you who you are
- Can’t get rid of it, always there
- Pain, uncertainty, constant worry
- Need it to grow though, from adversity
- Learn to love the process of nullifying pain, uncertainty, constant worry
- String of pearls
- I’m the one that puts the next pearl on the string
- line, circle, line, circle, it’s a series of actions
- You keep going, all actions are equivalent, just the next action, all the same size
- The winner who is willing to go through uncertainty and accept the consequence
- In the pearl there’s a small turd, can’t think about the turd inside the pearl, pearl around every turd there’s good even in the bad
- Shadow, the version of yourself you want to hide from the world the most
- You can see yourself that way even with so much other success
- It’s the part you are ashamed of
- First you need to find your shadow, visualize a time you felt inferior/embarrassed/ashamed of, the part you wish you were not but you are and can’t get rid of it
- Talk to your shadow, how did you deal with him
- Shadow needs attention from you only, what can you do to make up for not paying attention to him?
- Anything high stakes, have a conversation with the shadow and tolerate what happens, other people’s opinion feels way less
- Constantly relate to it, respect it, otherwise it will become destructive
- Looking for wholeness
- The snapshot (the realm of illusion)
- You are looking for the perfect snapshot (moment, wife, job, perfect x)
- No movement, no depth but you’ve told yourself something magical happens if you get to that
- But, pain, uncertainty, and constant worry
- Drive for success is trying to get to that snapshot but depressing when it doesn’t live up to
- The maze
- Always involves other people
- Example when someone always wants to talk about another person,
- Quest for fairness puts your life on hold but it’s a maze that doesn’t let you move forward
- You can’t get that time back
- You’re not going to get it from others, but satisfied by active love
- Imagine you are in a universe filled with love, dense with love, feel yourself taking in all of that love and place all of the love in the universe in your heart
- See the person you hate/despise and send all that love towards the other person, hold nothing back, feel it enter their body and become one, you can become one with anyone
- It’s not for forgiveness, not for them, it’s so you can move forward
- Radical acceptance
- When something goes wrong, need a reflex to squeeze the juice out of the lemon, find the use from it
- What am I going to do about it now
- Not allowed to make a judgment, find something positive about it
- Faith that there is something of value, everything becomes more meaningful
- You get meaning from small things, all events have value, if you do that there is tremendous opportunity
- Like a plan going through the cloud, can’t judge everything by your current experience
- Every thought affects your mood
- Grateful flow, remembering the sun above the clouds even if you can’t see it
- Process of creating things you are grateful for, smaller the better so you feel the gratefulness
- Keep naming things, then stop naming and feel the feeling take over, that’s grateful flow
- Make it a creative act, dig to find things, it helps. Don’t say the same things over and over
- Be grateful as much as possible, part X tells you not to be
- Loss processing
- Worrying about loss
- Potency of non-attachment, pursue it but also willing to lose it
- Pick something you’ve become too attached to that you are afraid to let go of it
- Imagine a tree, you are grasping a branch, you’re afraid to let go, but you do and you fall, say you are willing to lose everything and you hit the sun and your body burns up, you’re radiating a loving feeling and you see all the suns everywhere saying “we are everywhere” all you can do is give you can never take
- Not trying to be detached, move towards that one thing can take away your sense of wholeness
- The secret of life is that you won’t figure it out ever, happiness is how you accept that, then what you do about it